President Trump

But, I've noticed only the regulars stay maybe because there's comradery there which is fine & understandable but it can feel like highschool all over again lol.

I think erasing seeing who has 'liked' posts will help. I love everyone's perspective but I can't be liking every post lol that would be tiresome.

Coming to regulars defence due to a difference in opinion etc doesn't help the site or non regulars stick around.

I'm always saddened to see ppl no longer post & wonder what happened. Of course, ppl get busy with life. Ppl genuinely like the site & want to post, like the ppl, but there are just some things that probably do more harm such as being able to see who has liked posts & fiercely defending regulars without maybe considering things. And constantly feeling like an outsider so the site is likely just to keep the regulars when others offer amazing perspective, too.

And it's always 'If you don't like it, you can leave' But, ppl do like the site but are surprised by certain behaviour... So, yea, it definitely turns ppl off posting when they love the ppl & site altogether, just not how cliquey it can get...

And of course, it's understandable to be sus of AI bots & whatnot but, English isn't always everyone's first language so they may want to partake & use a translator. I just don't know how hard that would be & can this site be viewed in different languages? Or perhaps someone's intellect needs to be considered. All sorts of different scenarios...

 

My perspective isn't about a particular topic & disagreeing or agreeing with what is being said. It's just an observation & suggestion with being able to see who has liked posts, who likes posts (regulars get the most likes). It's fair to say members will defend long time members.

I think it's also fair to say only the regulars stick around. What's wrong with that? I even said I love the site & the ppl. I'm probably not expressing myself well enough, which also happens & you're misunderstanding me.

I don't need to post, you'll tell me to leave, but why can't ppl express their observations about the site, too? I'm not here to be a hater, I think it's a wonderful site which I have read daily for many years, but after partaking yes, it's probably not for me & that's ok.

I know the regulars will carry on & I hope they do because I love reading. It's being treated harshly I don't like, rather than trying to understand what someone means & asking what they mean...

Like any place on the internet there will be problems & users can express how they feel. It's not one trying to tear the site down. The ppl on here are kind but there's a comradery there which is noticeable that may not always create much room for new members or ppl who don't post regularly. Or ppl coming to a regulars defence - I mean my posts won't be liked because it is seen who likes posts & I'm not really a regular so no one's coming to my defence lol.

I really mean no harm, it's really innocent feedback. I respect everyone's perspective on here, even tho I may not agree with what is being said. I don't need to fight ppl on the internet, there's already too much of that happening in the world...

 

I have labelled the site as wonderful with amazing ppl. Does is seem cliquey to a person who hasn't established themselves here? It has for me, others would share the same sentiment, therefore they don't post. Anywhere can seem cliquey at first, a new parish, a new job. So, it's up to the individual if they want to continue to go or not. All fair, it's better to try to understand what a member means rather than jumping the gun with what we think they mean & also labelling them. It goes both ways...

 

I just want to say that I appreciate what you do for the forum John. For free I might add. You are an excellent mediator and watch dog in a cyber jungle. And extremely charitable. So a big thank you.

 

I do have to say one thing, we are not in gradeschool. I don't post to count the Likes I get. And we also have bad days and nights. This isn't a contest.no one has to agree with us.
If our feelings are hurt by lack of likes or replies then we need a better prayer life. But I do know when a gentle soul posts something, no matter what it is,
They don't deserve to get a reply like I read.
God can and will use whoever He wants to, to work in His plan. From the best to the worst of us.

 

There's a reason certain people on this forum seem well-liked... It's because they are indeed likeable, have invested not only in the topics on this site, but in the other members, and have become like family or close friends. If you've been around long enough, you'll see members going through hard things and being there for each other, even meeting up in real life to help or support each other, and over time relationships are forged. You see a person's character over the course of the years, and you are able to see past certain flaws or if they're having a bad day and become a bit too harsh in a post. That's harder to do with newcomers, because they just aren't known well enough. And that takes time. It also takes some thick skin, lol.

I don't consider myself to be new, or a part of the established circle, so to speak...I'm kind of in the middle, I think. I've been around for several years and have had my fair share of arguments and misunderstandings. I have very strong feelings and opinions and that has caused me to clash with others, and sometimes I've had to take a break, step back and examine myself. Because the fact is, this forum is not just a sounding board of ideas, but it's a group of people, worthy of love and consideration. And many people here are older than I am, which means they especially deserve my respect, even if I may disagree with them. Sometimes we forget that, sitting comfortably at home while looking at a bunch of screen names on a forum. If you and I were sitting in a room with all the other posters here, looking them in the eye, I bet you and I would be a lot more quiet and let all these wiser, more experienced people speak. And we would see the love and care they've poured into people during their lives etched into their faces, and we would value their opinions, even if we disagree.

As far as "likes," maybe just don't pay attention to that. I "like" a comment whose contents I agree with, not out of a sense of clique-y-ness. I don't feel like I'm a part of any clique here. When I walk away and take a break from the forum, I don't think anyone notices, lol. But absolutely, when I see a forum member that I have observed for many years being kind, thoughtful, and wise, and especially when I recognize they have a gentle heart, if another member unfairly personally attacks them, or misunderstands them, I'm probably going to say something. Especially if no one else has said anything yet. Because I know what it feels like to be misunderstood and have no one speak for me...and while that is very good for my pride and overly-sensitive feelings, lol, if I can help someone else not feel that way, I will. Whether she is a member of the "popular circle" or not, she is a person with a heart and feelings, and she matters.

And that's what I try to remember when I've gotten carried away arguing with a long-standing member whom I just don't agree with or don't understand very well. They are loved by the other members here and probably earned that respect and love through their care for others here. And my strong opinion is probably not worth very much in the end, anyway. Although I do have to say that mutual respect is often forged through some heated arguments and apologies, lol. There is a previous poster who hasn't been around for a while, whom I think of fondly, even though we ALWAYS clashed. He and I were so directly opposed in so many opinions, that we were always butting heads, but after challenging each other over and over, we began to respect each other and soften our stances. We began to see the other person better, instead of just our frustrating ideas. And then those ideas became a lot less frustrating, because understanding the person made his opinions make a lot more sense. And then I could actually learn a bit from them. That wouldn't have happened if we had just dismissed the other or run from the forum and nursed hurt feelings.

So anyway, stick around, and you might forge some relationships over time that make things feel less "clique-y" to you. It's hard to feel insecure and unknown when you want to feel loved and accepted. What I do when I feel that way is go to God and ask Him to not only comfort me, but work on me and make me more understanding and loving toward others. Because I think that we can be blind sometimes to the things about ourselves that make it hard for others and impede forming relationships. I think my pride gets in the way a lot. But this forum is such a great antidote to pride, if you let hurt feelings humble you instead of running!

 

Yes John has a big family, has to work hard and he is doing this for nothing with little enough thanks and I am sure he has plenty of troubles enough without breaking his poor heart.

I just checked I have 148,572 likes and only an old dog and a mad chicken killing cat to take care off and a good pension, so I don't care myself.

If John wasn't taking care of the IT I don't think this place would last a week.

 

Amen. Such a wise soul in such young body.

 

I may be completely naive but I honestly didn't know there to be cliques here. I have had my fair share of debates on the forum, have had many members that I have gravitated more towards over the years, have lost many dear friends who were very public on the forum but I feel they may linger and check in from time to time and I have also had times when I am talking a lot and then not so much. That has been due to many things; life, dryness, hard times, etc, but I always know this family is here for whenever I return and I always see this as family and see all individuals as family whether they have been here a few weeks or many many years. I think it can become very natural to side with others given one topic then all of a sudden with a whole different group of people with a different topic. There have been members in my own past here that I disagreed with very openly, publicly and frankly without charity and I have corrected that in myself and apologized over the years to those people. We must always be charitable regardless. I don't mind the likes because when someone says something that truly touches my heart, I want to express that feeling with liking there post. If the like button wasn't here anymore then I would just reply with how much I like what they have said. It is not a favoritism contest in my mind or cliques it is just real human emotion.

 

Yes fine words.

 

I only engage online with two platforms, MOG and X. I consider this little forum my internet “home” because it’s where I feel safe. I am surrounded by likeminded and good hearted individuals. I can speak freely and not be concerned whether or not my posts will be liked. Disagreements are normal and in some instances enlightening. In comparison the X platform is like the Wild West. You never know what crazy people will crawl out of the woodwork to attack a comment that you’ve made in passing, it’s high school drama on steroids and no is no one coming to your defense. This is why I am so grateful for the protection of this forum. As far as I’m concerned life is too short to count “likes”, no one here is keeping score.

 

This forum was set up for these times.

All has been a preparation for what has soon to come.

I couldn't be where I am spiritually without the personal help of Padraig. Only God knows how much he helped me when I first joined the forum & I will be eternally grateful.

I hope he reads this and blushes lol but I mean it. And the fruit of his help and this forum is my wee book on the rosary and our Lady.

 

JMJforever,

I happen to be one of the original members of MOG started back in 2007, I believe: Padraig, maryrose, and a few others...lots of ups and downs...there were a couple of times I took a siesta. Why do I stay? To be honest, unlike my wonderful wife, I'm a "big picture person" who finds it hard to keep my mouth shut! The international participation allows for global perspectives to be shared which probably cements my ongoing presence; I do love people and miss former members. Though I've accumulated a good amount of likes (due mostly to longevity), I must admit I've been admonished at times (rightly so). But I do praise God I'm not a moderator!

So yes, as you say: there's a comradery there which is noticeable that may not always create much room for new members or ppl who don't post regularly.

But I do enjoy your input and have read every one of your posts. So whether you retire, or only take a siesta and later pop in for a few comments, my prayers for you and others, will remain.

 

Members are liked because this forum is a Catholic family. Long time members have been a part of this loving family for many years and the friendships flourish because of Jesus and His Holy Mother.
We have persevered for years through thick and thin.

 

AMEN

 

So beautiful I might print this and get it framed. Thank you.